Pooja during Menstrual period, Hindu Brahmin [duplicate]

Question

We had a big argument y'day at hour house over pooja during Menstrual period.

My wife wanted to do Sravan somvar rituals during her 3rd day of period. She cooked Kheer and wanted to put it as a Prasad in front of God. She actually asked my mom to put the prasad in Mandir. Since my mom knew she is on her periods she said this is not right thing to do as its against ritual and not to perform any pooja or put prsad in front of god. This turned into very heated argument between both of them. My mom was very adamant about her not to perform rituals and my wife's response was I never object your ways when you perform pooja so please let me do it my way!

Usually, its not a problem for me as I think as long as you perform pooja with good intentions, you could do it as the way you want. However, my mom is visiting us for couple of months and I understand her point. I took my mom's side and told my wife to skip rituals this week. She could do it the way she wants when mom is not here. My wife was really mad at my behaviour.

I was thinking all night if I took the right stand?

My wife was arguing about where in Hinduism its mentioned that Women are not supposed do Pooja during menstruation?

Overall, Gist of all my writing is, I would like to know if female is allowed to perform Pooja rituals at home during menstruation period?

Thanks.

Answer 1

Your mom was correct, and you took the correct stand by supporting her. Even if your mom is not at your home, that is the correct stand, and you should not ask your wife to do puja during her periods.

During menstruation for 4 days, rituals and puja are not allowed for women - https://hinduism.stackexchange.com/a/17620/4435

First appreciate your wife's devotion to God. Not many young women nowadays evince much interest in spiritual matters.

Then ask your wife "Did you see God yourself.. if not, who told you that God exists and that you should do puja for him?"
She will reply "My parents, elders etc."
Then tell her "Ask those same people if it is ok to do puja during menstruation"

If your parents say "Krishna existed and he was dark complexion", and you say "I didn't see Krishna, so I don't believe he exists", then that is scientific.

But if you say "I didn't see Krishna, I believe he exists, but I don't believe he is dark complexsion", then that is not scientific, because you are choosing to believe part of it based on faith and to disbelieve another part of it based on your own limited intellect. No proper scientist would do that.

Krishna, through shastras and acharyas has given us guidelines on how to live life. Playing the game of life according rules set by the referee will give you desired outcomes. If you start to question the referee you'll get red card no matter how much you argue.

Answer 2

I was about to comment but I don't have privilege to do so.. You are right at your place but, different people do different things in different situations. Some are dear son some are dear husband. But if you really want to be sure that you are on right side then you should try to find an answer "is it really right to do that ritual or not " in broader perspective that is if it really is okk then take your wife's side and if you think that if it not okk then take your mom's side. So your first task will be to decide whether it is really okk or not.

And my view is "phle k samay me yagya aur agni se door rhne k liye (qki ese samay me rest ki jarurat hoti h ) to kaam se bhi aram mile isliye ye sab rituals banaye gye per unka roop esa ban gya h ki jese koi galat kaam krne wale ka bahishkaar kr deta h " So I myself think that it is not a right thing to do with girls...if they want to .. you should let her do it,and don't oppose her,since for a good prayer you just need a good heart and peaceful mind. :)