Sorry for being blunt but I just realised that this question depicts the loss of gyaan among the masses which is catalysed by absence gurus/saints. The way society had criminalised of hindu society.
First of all one should realise the difference between moksha and Self-realisation.
One have to go in order, many times, many ways to be able to see self-realisation. It can very rarely be achieved by aiming for "it" directly !! but aspiring for it may help.
First one have to define his/her dharma then do appropriate artha for it and fulfil of his/her kaamnas for that path then when we achieve it we get glimpses of moksha then from a pool of those glimpses we start to see beyond then probably the techniques of pratayaharas can be implemented to achieve various stages of self-realisations.
For e.g.:- One has to define his/her dharma. This is the place where one should focus his/her energies first. The more diverse the better. What is one's dharma, as a student, son, husband,wife, brother, sister, goldsmith, scientist, etc.
Then comes the artha (means) by which you enhance or complete your dharma be it notes, respect or gratitude, earn money, get good contacts, develop exceptional skill etc
After living some life we develop some kaamnayiens, icchas we fulfil those then you would fulfil those like getting a promotion, getting fame, acquiring some post, etc.
Then after completion of kaamnas you get a sense of inner peace this is moksha. Here in these moments people, mostly saansaarik (materialistic) people, get glimpse of divinity. Rise of vivek,etc And go for soonya, nir vikalp samadhi, nirvana according to their karmas and saadhanas also known as purusharthas.
By defining our dharma we pave the path. Our path.
These are the four purusharthas, and how they give phalas (fruits). In each part of life we choose different purusharthas for ourselves.
I hope I may be able to clear some fog. I hope people bring different perspectives on this.