I have always noticed how a Christian wedding and an Islamic Nikaah both mandate that the consent of both the parties be given for the union to be sanctioned.

However, I haven't seen anything similar in a traditional Hindu wedding. Do we have something similar? If so, I'd like to know more about it.

  • 2
    need more clear detail in your question, because consent is the part of hindu marriage too, though it happens before the marriage, called with different names as roka,tilak,engagement and others. Please describe more. Thanks.
    – Mr. K
    Aug 20, 2015 at 20:38
  • Also there are 2 types of consents: "Genuine" and "Formality"!
    – iammilind
    Aug 21, 2015 at 6:56
  • As per Hindu scriptures, there are 8 types of marriages. Vedic tradition emphasis on Kundali match over formal consent. However, in current day context it is Gandharva Marriage which allows a marriage by mutual arrangement between two consenting adults who are in love.
    – WeShall
    Sep 20, 2016 at 1:28
  • 1
    Refer this if you want to know more about Hindu wedding as per tradition & scriptures - The Hindu Sacrament Of Marriage
    – WeShall
    Sep 20, 2016 at 1:36

1 Answer 1


According to the Asvalayana Grihya Sutra KANDIKÂ 6 verse 5:

  1. He may marry her, after a mutual agreement has been made (between the lover and the damsel): this (is the wedding called) Gândharva.

Here we have the type of marriage in which consent is expressly stated. But that doesn't imply the lack of consent in other forms, it just means that besides the groom and the bride other family members are also involved in the decision unlike in the Gandharva Vivah.

In a modern Hindu marriage, although there isn't an explicit question asked to either the bride and the groom at any point, yet there are two ceremonies that offer this option:

  1. Panigraham - When the groom takes the bride's hand in his own, it signifies the agreement of both of them to the union.

  2. Saptapadi in which the bride and the groom give each other seven vows. Each of these is a confirmation of their commitment towards each other and towards making their married life a success.

Asvalayana Grihya Sutra KANDIKA 7 Verse 6 mentions the following promise:

  1. Leading her three times round the fire and the water-pot, so that their right sides are turned towards (the fire, &c.), he murmurs, 'This am I, that art thou; that art thou, this am I; the heaven I, the earth thou; the Sâman I, the Rik thou. Come! Let us here marry. Let us beget offspring. Loving, bright, with genial mind may we live a hundred autumns.'

Also, the practice of Swayam-var where the girl sought out her own partner was an accepted one as attested to by the Manu Smriti Verse 9.90-

त्रीणि वर्षाण्युदीक्षेत कुमार्यर्तुमती सती । ऊर्ध्वं तु कालादेतस्माद् विन्देत सदृशं पतिम् ॥ ९० ॥

Having reached puberty, the maiden may wait for three years; after that time, she shall procure a suitable husband.—(90)

Verse 9.91 states:

अदीयमाना भर्तारमधिगच्छेद् यदि स्वयम् । नैनः किं चिदवाप्नोति न च यं साऽधिगच्छति ॥ ९१ ॥

When a maiden, when not given away, herself procures a husband, she incurs no sort of sin; nor does the man whom she weds.—(91)

Also the Subhadra Haran Parva of Mahabharat quotes Krishna as saying:

"Vasudeva answered, 'O bull amongst men, self-choice hath been ordained for the marriage of Kshatriyas. But that is doubtful (in its consequences), O Partha, as we do not know this girl's temper and disposition.'

All these imply consent from both the girl's as well as groom's side though again it is not in the form of an explicit question.

  • 1
    Another nice answer @Dr. Vineet
    – Viraj
    Oct 16, 2019 at 4:52
  • 1
    Thank you @Viraj am glad it was helpful for you Oct 17, 2019 at 17:03

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